toxic people

Move over juice cleanse, it’s time for a social cleanse

I am participating in the Zero to Hero challenge here on WordPress and in interacting with the community of bloggers that’s participating in this class I was inspired to write this post by Lhu Wen Kai’s post titled 5 Types of People You Should Avoid to be Happy , and Ditch the Bun’s Finding Myself in the Red Centre

I am a firm believer in forgiveness, second chances, and trying to see the best in people. I do not discard people lightly, but I strongly believe that sometimes it is best to part ways with a person who has become toxic in your life. We often talk about people and things making us happy, but aren’t we the ones really at the helm of that happiness? I choose to make myself happy by surrounding myself with people who bring out the best in me. I do not charge my husband with that responsibility. He does, in more ways than I can count, contribute to my happiness but I cannot lay responsibility for it at his feet. If I am unhappy about something I always bring it up. I ensure that we communicate by participating in that communication, by initiating that conversation. Self-care means that I am looking out for myself. I cannot expect people to know how I feel if I do not tell them.

I am very fortunate to be a part of a small group of reading enthusiasts online. Our conversations range from what we are currently reading, to what we are making for dinner. We are all very different, we have different opinions and points of view. I have learned a lot from these women and I feel that having them in my life makes my life better. Sometimes they challenge my beliefs, reinforce them, and sometimes they even change my thoughts about a given thing. These are the type of people who I love to have in my life.

As much as I love my online life there are times I need to step away from it. Social media is a wonderful thing, until it’s not. When I start feeling crabby or irritable at just about every post that comes through my feed I ask myself, is it me? Or is it them? It’s time for a social cleanse!  A juice cleanse makes us reconsider what we put into our bodies, well, a social cleanse makes us reconsider what we consume with our eyes and minds.

Here’s what you’ll need:

  1. Limits. Instead of dropping into your Twitter or Facebook feed constantly, set a specific time in the day to check your alerts and respond to anything important.
  2. Go whole hog and disconnect for an entire day, or two, or three. Sometimes I do this by simply browsing rather than participating, but other times I really do my best to stay offline completely.
  3. Limit your interaction with toxic people. These negative people range in variety and may include: the always negative, the woe is me, the look at me, look at me (also known as an attention seeker), the hates everything, and the share everything. Sometimes it’s enough to mute them from your feed.
  4. If you have a cluttered e-mail inbox take some time to go through it. Delete anything you don’t need, create folders for what you do. I find that cleaning up my inbox makes me feel productive.
  5. Unplug. Take a breather, regroup. I like to sit with a notebook and write down ideas for my blog, or jot down a to do list for the week. Taking time for yourself is important. We all need a break from all the interaction we do.
  6. Make a decision. If a person drains you, makes you feel bad, or in any way affects you negatively, choose to either address it or let them go.

Have you ever done a social cleanse? What things work for you?