I have been updating the blog daily but I am not sure that I will be able to continue to do so. I might switch it up to once or even twice a week. I am not sure but I thought I would mention it for those who read it regularly.
Speaking of too often, Diego woke up a lot last night. We put him to bed at 10:04pm he then woke up at 12:49am, 2:20am, 3:31am, 5:29am, 5:49am, 7am, 7:56am and finally woke up for good at 9:04am. I am beyond exhausted. Interrupted sleep is the worst thing in the world to me. I hate it so much and last night was over the top. I feel as though I hardly slept and when he woke up at 5:29am I was unable to go back to sleep. He was so restless and fidgety that I anticipated his rousing any second. It was driving me crazy.
When I am awake like this, tired but unable to sleep, I get a little peeved to see my husband slumbering away unaware of how miserable I am. Even worse, I know he will complain of how tired he is even though he went to bed soon after Diego and didn’t wake up once during the night. It’s so petty of me and I feel bad about it since he has to go to work but the reality is that once he’s gone I am on my own. I have to get things done with Diego in tow. I can’t call out to anybody when I need to run to the bathroom but Diego is screaming in his crib. Diego just has to stay put. I don’t wear diapers so the toilet is a necessity for me. I also can’t ask somebody to fix me a bottle because Diego is hungry but doesn’t want to be put down. I have to make things work. I have no choice.
Somedays I get annoyed that my husband, as wonderful as he is, relies on me to help him when he’s taking care of Diego. Don’t worry he doesn’t read this blog so he will never know I am venting here haha.
I am sharing this because this is real life. There are days when you’re tired and cranky and want to complain about every little thing. That’s ok, it’s healthy. If my relationship with my husband was all rainbows and butterflies I think I’d run the other way. A permanent smile is psychosis. You cannot expect to be happy all of the time and there are things within a marriage that need to be addressed. I know that my husband doesn’t mean to upset me, at least I hope he doesn’t, and that sometimes we do things without realizing how they are interpreted by the other person.
This is why talking about things are important. I am not suggesting we all air our dirty laundry. Serious issues should be addressed behind closed doors. What I am saying is that often we make a big deal out of something small and blow up when it’s unwarranted. Now that I’ve written this post I will most likely casually mention to my husband that I slept really poorly last night and that I’d like to take a nap. Once I’m refreshed I can tackle some chores.
That’s my plan.